fbpx

The Arthritis Newsletter

Summer 2014

I Love/Hate My Meds: A Personal Reflection

By Sharan Rai

 

Sharan Rai and Dr. Mary De Vera

 

May cause liver damage. Or bladder cancer. Maybe some eye problems. Some hot flashes? May increase your risk of developing lymphoma. And definitely do not take while pregnant.

 

…May cause you to eat four McDonald’s crispy chicken snack wraps and wonder why you didn’t order a fifth.

 

I’m looking at you, prednisone.

I know pharmaceutical companies are required to list the scary stuff, and I generally avoid thinking about it (because really, what good does that do?), but sometimes those thoughts linger in the back of my mind.

 

Am I going to have good results at next year’s ophthalmology appointment? What if I develop vision problems and I have to switch to a different therapy? Would it be as effective? Would the pain come back? Could I stay in school?

 

And what if I’m that statistic who develops some type of cancer? I’m 24 years old! Would I be a survivor? Would I be able to finish school?

 

Am I fighting fire with fire?

 

Some days, those are the thoughts that race through my mind.

 

But then, I think about life before I had an effective treatment plan. I was in agonizing pain. I had extensive neurological symptoms. I couldn’t function physically or mentally, and my grades trended toward the second half of the alphabet. I was barely a person.

 

And now? I’m in graduate school working with people I love. I’m an A+ student with multiple scholarships. I even have publications under review, and I’m only halfway into the first year of my program. None of this would have been possible without taking my medication.

 

We all have a love-hate relationship with our prescriptions. I never thought I would be faced with these sorts of decisions in my early twenties, but it’s a price I pay to function with a chronic disease.

 

At the end of the day, we can’t control everything. Life happens, and we have to take it as it comes. So I focused on what was within my control – I made an informed decision with my rheumatologist, consulted my pharmacist on several occasions, and get regular blood work done to make sure everything is in check.

 

And then I focus on living my life. Because there was once a time when I couldn’t – and now I can.

Share This

Share This

Share this post with your friends!

[gravityform id=4 title=false ajax=true]
<div class='gf_browser_unknown gform_wrapper gravity-theme' id='gform_wrapper_4' ><div id='gf_4' class='gform_anchor' tabindex='-1'></div> <div class='gform_heading'> <span class='gform_description'></span> </div><form method='post' enctype='multipart/form-data' target='gform_ajax_frame_4' id='gform_4' action='/i-lovehate-my-meds-a-personal-reflection/#gf_4' novalidate> <div class='gform_body gform-body'><div id='gform_fields_4' class='gform_fields top_label form_sublabel_below description_below'><div id="field_4_1" class="gfield gfield_contains_required field_sublabel_below field_description_below hidden_label gfield_visibility_visible" ><label class='gfield_label' for='input_4_1' >First Name<span class="gfield_required"><span class="gfield_required gfield_required_text">(Required)</span></span></label><div class='ginput_container ginput_container_text'><input name='input_1' id='input_4_1' type='text' value='' class='large' placeholder='First Name' aria-required="true" aria-invalid="false" /> </div></div><div id="field_4_2" class="gfield gfield_contains_required field_sublabel_below field_description_below hidden_label gfield_visibility_visible" ><label class='gfield_label' for='input_4_2' >Last Name<span class="gfield_required"><span class="gfield_required gfield_required_text">(Required)</span></span></label><div class='ginput_container ginput_container_text'><input name='input_2' id='input_4_2' type='text' value='' class='large' placeholder='Last Name' aria-required="true" aria-invalid="false" /> </div></div><div id="field_4_3" class="gfield gfield_contains_required field_sublabel_below field_description_below hidden_label gfield_visibility_visible" ><label class='gfield_label' for='input_4_3' >Email<span class="gfield_required"><span class="gfield_required gfield_required_text">(Required)</span></span></label><div class='ginput_container ginput_container_email'> <input name='input_3' id='input_4_3' type='email' value='' class='large' placeholder='Email Address' aria-required="true" aria-invalid="false" /> </div></div></div></div> <div class='gform_footer top_label'> <input type='submit' id='gform_submit_button_4' class='gform_button button' value='Subscribe' onclick='if(window["gf_submitting_4"]){return false;} if( !jQuery("#gform_4")[0].checkValidity || jQuery("#gform_4")[0].checkValidity()){window["gf_submitting_4"]=true;} ' onkeypress='if( event.keyCode == 13 ){ if(window["gf_submitting_4"]){return false;} if( !jQuery("#gform_4")[0].checkValidity || jQuery("#gform_4")[0].checkValidity()){window["gf_submitting_4"]=true;} jQuery("#gform_4").trigger("submit",[true]); }' /> <input type='hidden' name='gform_ajax' value='form_id=4&amp;title=&amp;description=1&amp;tabindex=0' /> <input type='hidden' class='gform_hidden' name='is_submit_4' value='1' /> <input type='hidden' class='gform_hidden' name='gform_submit' value='4' /> <input type='hidden' class='gform_hidden' name='gform_unique_id' value='' /> <input type='hidden' class='gform_hidden' name='state_4' value='WyJbXSIsIjBkMjRlYjFkM2FlNTc1OTE5MDU0MTVkNzE4YjNjMjdlIl0=' /> <input type='hidden' class='gform_hidden' name='gform_target_page_number_4' id='gform_target_page_number_4' value='0' /> <input type='hidden' class='gform_hidden' name='gform_source_page_number_4' id='gform_source_page_number_4' value='1' /> <input type='hidden' name='gform_field_values' value='' /> </div> </form> </div> <iframe style='display:none;width:0px;height:0px;' src='about:blank' name='gform_ajax_frame_4' id='gform_ajax_frame_4' title='This iframe contains the logic required to handle Ajax powered Gravity Forms.'></iframe> <script type="text/javascript"> gform.initializeOnLoaded( function() {gformInitSpinner( 4, 'https://www.arthritisresearch.ca/wp-content/plugins/gravityforms/images/spinner.svg' );jQuery('#gform_ajax_frame_4').on('load',function(){var contents = jQuery(this).contents().find('*').html();var is_postback = contents.indexOf('GF_AJAX_POSTBACK') >= 0;if(!is_postback){return;}var form_content = jQuery(this).contents().find('#gform_wrapper_4');var is_confirmation = jQuery(this).contents().find('#gform_confirmation_wrapper_4').length > 0;var is_redirect = contents.indexOf('gformRedirect(){') >= 0;var is_form = form_content.length > 0 && ! is_redirect && ! is_confirmation;var mt = parseInt(jQuery('html').css('margin-top'), 10) + parseInt(jQuery('body').css('margin-top'), 10) + 100;if(is_form){jQuery('#gform_wrapper_4').html(form_content.html());if(form_content.hasClass('gform_validation_error')){jQuery('#gform_wrapper_4').addClass('gform_validation_error');} else {jQuery('#gform_wrapper_4').removeClass('gform_validation_error');}setTimeout( function() { /* delay the scroll by 50 milliseconds to fix a bug in chrome */ jQuery(document).scrollTop(jQuery('#gform_wrapper_4').offset().top - mt); }, 50 );if(window['gformInitDatepicker']) {gformInitDatepicker();}if(window['gformInitPriceFields']) {gformInitPriceFields();}var current_page = jQuery('#gform_source_page_number_4').val();gformInitSpinner( 4, 'https://www.arthritisresearch.ca/wp-content/plugins/gravityforms/images/spinner.svg' );jQuery(document).trigger('gform_page_loaded', [4, current_page]);window['gf_submitting_4'] = false;}else if(!is_redirect){var confirmation_content = jQuery(this).contents().find('.GF_AJAX_POSTBACK').html();if(!confirmation_content){confirmation_content = contents;}setTimeout(function(){jQuery('#gform_wrapper_4').replaceWith(confirmation_content);jQuery(document).scrollTop(jQuery('#gf_4').offset().top - mt);jQuery(document).trigger('gform_confirmation_loaded', [4]);window['gf_submitting_4'] = false;wp.a11y.speak(jQuery('#gform_confirmation_message_4').text());}, 50);}else{jQuery('#gform_4').append(contents);if(window['gformRedirect']) {gformRedirect();}}jQuery(document).trigger('gform_post_render', [4, current_page]);} );} ); </script>